


*peach emoji*

by sunaddicted



Series: Superbat October Drabbles [27]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Crack, Fluff and Crack, Funny, M/M, Random & Short, Social Media
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-27
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-08-08 12:21:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16429298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunaddicted/pseuds/sunaddicted
Summary: [...]"There's an Instagram profile dedicated to your ass""And?""There's..." Clark checked the profile "5.8k of followers"





	*peach emoji*

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: peach emoji

_*peach emoji*_

Clark had never been too interested in social media but Lois had pointed out to him how a journalist needed to keep an ear to the ground in all ways possible and now he had a Twitter handle he didn't know how to use and an Instagram account that would stay hauntingly empty because he couldn't effort someone looking too closely at his face and seeing a resemblance to Superman: it would make his life unnecessarily complicated and jeopardize countless of other superheroes' secret identities - and he didn't have the intention of posting food pictures like a lot of people seemed to do. 

He scrolled down his feed, frowning as he tried to understand the appeal in endless slime videos and meme with dubious meaning; Tim had explained to him that an algorithm filled his feed based on what content the people he followed and he liked. 

Clark wondered about who the hell he had to blame for the mildly disgusting videos by a certain Dr Pimple Popper that Instagram thought he absolutely had to see - anyone else would have blamed the girls (Barbara or Stephanie, maybe) but knowing just how vast Dick's array of skincare product was, Clark wouldn't feel too bad about pointing his finger against him. 

Still, despite the fact that he puzzled about the strange collection of contents thrown at him, Clark couldn't really stop scrolling: it was... mindnumbingly soothing. 

Until his eyes landed on a very familiar ass, muscular and encased in expensive tailored trousers that he vividly remembered sliding down a pair of thick thighs that took his breath away whenever they were wrapped around his head and kept him where he was wanted. 

Needed. 

Clark tapped on the small square, curious to see who would post such a picture; he wasn't too surprised about the fact that his boyfriend's ass was plastered all over the internet - everything about Bruce was smeared on the media, talking about his money and his party shenanigans. But the sheer objectification Bruce was object of made Clark's stomach tighten with uneasiness, even as he started reading the comments under the picture, his frown getting deeper and deeper.

 **spygotham** : spotted in the courthouse the best ass in Gotham

 **kaymay** : DAT ASS * _peach emoji_ * @carmenp

 **bwaynefans** : slayyy

 **codytories** : how many squats he do??

 **paulie98** : @justagothamgal @sol ♡♡♡

 **sol** : @paulie98 fuuUucKk

 **drhk** : I wanna fuck that ass so badly

 **amandrew** : daddy

"Your face is going to get stuck like that, if you keep frowning"

Clark looked up at the man that had sat next to him, turning his phone towards Bruce so that he could see the picture "There's an Instagram profile dedicated to your ass"

"And?"

"There's..." Clark checked the profile "5.8k of followers"

Bruce tilted his head to the side "I fail to see why is that bothering you" he admitted "Are you jealous?"

"No!" The word slipped out of his mouth accidentally louder than he had meant to "No, it's just... doesn't it bother you? The fact that so many people write such.. crude things about you"

"I see" Bruce took the mobile from Clark's hands, fingers flying over the touchscreen "I've been the object of such comments since I officially entered high society, they don't bother me any longer"  he said, shrugging. 

"It's..."

"Very superficial, I know" Bruce said with a smile and handed back the mobile "There's a profile dedicated to Superman's ass too" he added with a bright grin and leaned into his lover's side, laughing when he saw the scandalized expression on his face "You're such a prude"

**Author's Note:**

> This is so random but writing it made me laugh lol


End file.
